डब्बों में सिमटी ज़िन्दगी !

हर सुबह उठकर जब मैं सूरज की किरणे ढूंढती हूँ,
एक डब्बे से झांकती हुई हिचकिचाती सी किरण मुझसे मिलने आती है।
मैं उसे बाहों में भरना चाहती हूँ , पर वो डर जाती है,
कहती है, जैसे में इस डब्बे में सिमट गई हूँ , वो वैसे खोना नहीं चाहती,
एक टुकड़ा नहीं उसे पूरा आसमान चाहिए, खुद को पहचान सके कम से कम ऐसा एक जहाँ चाहिए।


जब मैं हरी ज़मीन का आँचल ओढना चाहती हूँ, वो खुद में सिमट जाती है,
डब्बों के इस जंगल को वो समझ नहीं पाती है,
मैं उसमे खुद को समां लेना चाहती हूँ , पर वो मुझसे दूर चली जाती है,
कहती है , मेरे जैसे वो खुद को बांध नहीं सकती
उसे अपना आंचल सारे जहाँ में फैलाना है,
नाकि बटें हुए इन बंद डब्बों में सिमट कर अपना अस्तित्व खोना है।

जब मैं उस पंछी के साथ गुनगुनाना चाहती हु, वो चुप हो जाती है,
इन डब्बों में बसे उस दबे हुए शोर की आवाज़ वो समझ नहीं पाती है ।
मैं उसके गीतों को अपना बनाना चाहती हूँ, पर वो मेरे अन्दर कोई संगीत देख नहीं पाती है,
कहती है , मेरी तरह इन डब्बों में बसे शोर में वो खुद के सुरों खो नहीं सकती,
उसके गीत सारे जहाँ में गूंजते जाएँगे,
मेरे इन  डिब्बों के शोर में तो, वो कहीं दूर खो जाएँगे ।

इस डब्बों के शहर में क्या पाया मैंने,
ना मुझे अँधेरे से जगाने वाली किरण मेरे पास है,
इन डब्बों में बसी उन ठंडी भावनाओ से खुद को बचा पाऊं ना उस ज़मीन के आँचल को ओढने की आस है,
सब भूलकर गुनगुनाऊ वो गीत भी ढूंढ नहीं पाती हूँ, डब्बों में बसे उस डरे हुए शोर में ऐसे उलझ कर रह जाती हूँ ।

काश के एक दिन ये डिब्बे ढह जाएं ,
इन डब्बों के अन्दर बसे वो मुर्दा जिस्म इंसान बनकर बहार आयें,
सूरज की किरणों को बाहों में भरकर, इस ज़मीन के आँचल में सिमट पाएं .
वो गीत जो खो गए हैं, उनके सुरों को मिलाकर एक नया गीत गुनगुनाऐं ।

Shit ! I fell in love again…(and again …& again…..& again…)

What is the right age to fall in love ? or how many times you can fall in love ?are there any laws applicable to fall in love ??

Ridhi was 16….no 15….hmmm 12… I guess 10 ..NNNaaa...8 years old when she fell in love (for the first time :P). her first love was that cute little boy in his class sitting next to the window, who seemed to be eternally silent .

She always wished if someday her god fairy wud come and grant her wish of sitting besides him and one fine day the magic happened . the class teacher (and not god fairy ) granted her wish.How could she ever forget those endless chit chatting in between classes, sharing the lunch box , fights which never lasted more than an hour,she was so excited ….oh! she had a boyfriend now…:D but all good things come to an end.her father was transferred to another city and she had to end her love story (or so she thought) . she was heart broken.but she always believed dat one day he wil find her (but she didnt leave a shoe behind so he cudnt ;))

She was 12 not interested in boyfriends anymore but one fine day she noticed that the tall guy from the next section was looking at her .she tried to ignore him, but alas! By then she had been hit by cupid’s arrow already. Shit! She was smiling to herself again but she knew last time she was just a kid and this time she is a “grown up kid”. But , within a year she realised she has responsibilities on her head like homework, tutions etc etc.so she sacrificed her love to the education system . but she was haunted by the memories of those sweet talks, sharing of notes, passing chits etc etc.and again she decided she will "never - ever" fall in love :)

But alas ! one fine day she reached that age of mandatory romance according to the parameters of Bollywood .How could she breach the laws of the holy bollywood. she was sweet "16" (remember all those sola baras ki bali umar kinda songs :D ) so she had to fall in love again. But this time it was serious and it was "true love".that athletic , wannabee,girl's most wanted, school captain stole her heart.they shared those beautiful moments in love for 2 years..she was happy.but they had 2 part their ways one day..school days were over and they went to different colleges.slowly she realised those feelings have faded..but those memories remained..she just fell out of love.but she was happy she had loved.it was a wonderful feeling.

It was her first year at college.it was month of december she was enjoying her tea.and suddenly she noticed "him".he was just so lost in his world not interested in anyone.she just wanted to look at him and she was sure he wil never look back..for next few days she made sure she was always in canteen at that time of the day but never expected he wil even notice.but one fine day a friend told her dat "he" wants to meet her.she was scared.they met 4 the first time and she felt as if her heart has just skipped a beat.it was beautiful.they were so happy 2gthr.they had so much to share with each other even wn they were silent.with each passing day she realised with him she can just fall in love every day..
it was raining heavily and they were on the middle of the road..and he kissed her for the 1st time.she was speechless..time had stopped at dat moment.She knew she wanted to be with him forever.

Years passed by but she still loved him the way she did the first day. (so she thought).she was insanely in love with him.and she loved it. it was beautiful

But she cud hint that things were changing .she cudnt see that spark in his eyes.but she ignored those thoughts.it was too bitter to accept.

But she cudnt holdon to things for long.this relation was slipping away 4m her hand like sand..but she just dint want to let go..

They switched to different cities.and she realised slowly she was nt thr in his life any more..she broke completely.

For some days al those sad songs made sense.there was somethng she was holding on to.but one day she decided she wil let go..she was hurt..but slowly realised its just human to fall out of love.and he did.

That day she decided she wil never give up on love.its a wonderful feeling and no one should miss it.. :-).
One day she wil just fall in love again.

In one life we can have many love stories.its not wrong.its human.dont restrict urself.fall in love enjoy it.dont draw boundaries to ur feelings..love truely and deeply ..u may get hurt or u may fal out of it but dat is the only way u wud hav lived life.

Love is a beautiful fèeling .dont miss it..find it :-)