तुम्हारा अस्तित्व ...........

मेरे अस्तित्व से तुम्हारा अस्तित्व जुड़ा है,

क्युंकी मैं पिता हूँ I

मैंने तुम्हे जीवन दिया,
तुम्हे संभाला अपनी स्नेह की छाया में,

कठोर दुनिया की धुप को तुमसे दूर किया,
पर अब तुम पर मेरा अधिकार कहाँ है ?

मेरे लिए अंजान हो तुम,

अब मैंने तुम्हारा कन्यादान किया है I

मेरे अस्तित्व से तुम्हारा अस्तित्व जुड़ा है,

क्युंकी मैं पति हूँ I

मैंने तुमको एक घर दिया है,

तुम्हारे जीवन को एक नई दिशा एक नया अर्थ दिया है I
मैं इस जीवन के अंत तक तुम्हारे साथ रहूँगा,

वो स्त्री जो तुम में अभी कही अधूरी है, मैं उसे पूरा करूँगा I
पर अब मुझे जाना है, तुम्हे एक माँ होने का जो अधिकार दिया मैंने,

तुम्हे, उसे निभाना है I

अब मुझसे ज्यादा तुम्हारे अस्तित्व पर उसका अधिकार है,

अब मेरा ये अंश ही तुम्हारे जीवन का आधार है I

मेरे अस्तित्व से तुम्हारा अस्तित्व जुड़ा है,

क्युंकी मैं बेटा हूँ I
मैंने तुम्हारे स्त्रीत्व को पूरा किया है,
एक बेटी, एक पत्नी थी तुम मैंने तुम्हे मातृत्व का सुख दिया है I
पर अब तुम्हारे ममता की छाया से मुझे निकलना है,
मैंने अपने लिए एक पथ चुना है मुझे उसपर चलना है I

तुम्हे एक बेटी, एक पत्नी, एक माँ बनाया हमने,
तुम्हारे अस्तित्व को अपने ढंग में अपनी तरह गढ़ा हमने I
तुम्हे एक नया अस्तिव दे सके वो भूमिका अब हमारे पास नहीं है,
अब तुम्हे अपने लिए एक अस्तित्व गढ़ना है,
तुम क्या हो, जब हम नहीं है

इस सवाल का उत्तर ढूँढना है I

पर अब तो जीवन का ये सफ़र ख़त्म होता हुआ है दिखता,
काश ये सवाल तुमने खुद से पहले किया होता। 

तुमने एक बेटी, पत्नी और माँ की भूमिका को निपुणता से निभाया,
पर भूल गई तुम खुदको कहीं, ये एहसास तुम्हे कभी नहीं आया। 

तुम फिर से आओगी हमारे जीवन में, 

पर इस बार अपने अस्तित्व का एक हिस्सा अपने लिए रखना,
अपनी अभिलाषाओं को अपने रंगों से उसको तुम गढ़ना। 

I fear .....

You have gone so deep inside me..that i have no strength to come any closer 2 u..
For i fear that i will confront the real u...

There is a mystery concealed deep down your eyes ..tht i no longer want to luk at u..
For i fear the loss of the solace my heart gets in its longing to reveal u...

Your words echo so deep dwn my heart..dat i wish never to hear u..
For,i fear the diming of those sounds..wch r safe in my heart as a part of u...

The divinity of feelings thru wch my soul cncts to u is so strong...dat i no more wnt u..
For i fear the loss of the sanctity of those feelings wn i see the tainted reflection of u ...

I live by faith so strong that u r for real..dat m scard to hold u..
For i fear the pain of knwing the truth..dat i wil eternaly wait 4 u...

Those moments in wch i hav knwn u ...were none i had known before....the truth of those feelings are safe in my heart and i ask for nothing more .....
for, i fear in the light of the harsh truth,the beauty of those moments will fade away....
i will hold them deep dwn the way they are...for they bring hope dat i will re-live those moments again one day

Unfolding layers....

Dont judge me by what i show you..

For , there are layers to my existence....
which are at times maligned and at times demand reverence...

Some times i wear a facade..for i m too scared to loose u..
Some times i stand undaunted & naked to be explored by you..

Sometimes i stand strong enough to let u go..
Sometimes i m vulnerable enough to give up evrythng to just hold on to you..

Sometimes i m cold as a stone 2 satisfy my ego..
Sometimes i bend down ..coz deep down..i need u dats the only thing i know...

Sometimes i give up and give no heed to what my heart has to say..
Sometimes i live by faith..and move towards an unknown way..

Some times i am rational and find reasons for all my actions..
Some times i am illogical and flow with the wind of my emotions...

Sometimes i am sure and clearly know myself..
Sometimes i am astonished and meet a new persona of my own self..

My heart pains when u judge the part of me to which u cudnt relate...
coz my heart yearns for the moment when you will unfold the layers u still haven't met...

A part of me wil get entangled in life and just move ahead..
But deep down somewhere there wil b a part of me wch wil be still caught in those moments and eternally wait...

Which part of me wil win the battle of existence and survive...i cant say..
At this hour evry part of me wishes dat you would look back..to find out that part of me wch is waiting 4 u to give purpose to its existence.. one day....

Turning 30....@ 25???

Bollywood... Has a bigger role to play in our lives than we presume..its the greatest source of inspiration,the mirror of our aspirations and smtms just a retrospect to the journey of our lives...

Just encounterd one of such spectacular creatns of bollywud..
Turning 30...

No..i dnt hav the intentions to review the movie...just analysing the msg sent across..

The protagonist naina..goes thru so much heartbreak,career crisis,getin cheated, rediscovering love and finding a new self...al at the thresh hold of 30...

But did she realy need those 30 years to grow up to dat maturity..wsnt it a matter of moments..moments wn u encounter life...and growup...dint u grow up in the moment wn the love of ur lif walkd out of ur life or the so cald mentor @ work fired u...or ur best frnd tuk ur galfrnd away...

@ 25 i cud relate 2 naina...i cud c y ws she angry,hw did she forgive,y ws she nasty..

i dint hav to touch the thresh hold of 30 to understand dat ppl walk out of ur lives wn u need thm most..its a world wr man eats man...people u trust stab u.. but u forgive u rediscover u find strength and u move ahead..

u laugh at some experiences..treasure sm..and just go numb 4 sm...

We do not grow up by years...we grow up by experiences...
Smtms u turn 30 at 25 sm tms u r stil 13 at 30....

Its how we live these experiences...wt we learn out of thm....and hw we decid to tk the course of life fwd...

Its turning 30 at mind..learning 4m experiences..but being 25 (even better 20) @ heart :) so u can cherish those experiences..and stil grow up....and yet njoy and appreciate life :)

Love her... pamper her..and thn bade her a gudbye...forever !

Have u ever wondered y sum ppl,sum memories just dnt go out of ur tgts...making u feel uncomfortable and sad @ times...

Wht do we do when smthngs just dnt get out of our mind...we fight within ourselves,ignore,get busy... But does dat realy help? For me it doesnt...and me being into the category of normal humans i asume it is just the case wth most of us...

I get into such troubles quite often...i guess dats coz my EQ (emotional quetiont)
is kind of higher than others..so i fall into ths trap of not been able to forget thngs..quite often..

I have tried and tested al the formulae of moving on..and discovred dat none works...i kept busy ,ate chocolates (trust me dsnt work) 24x7 workd hard on fb and eventualy changd my lingo wth omg...lol etc..
After al these efforts just figurd out one thng...nothng works !

Sadness is like a cute little puppy...the more u run away 4m it the more it wil chase u...the only way 2 deal wth it is..let it stay..hold it, pamper it and once its satisfied it wil leave. :)

and ths formula is tried tested and succesful...just b sad wn u r sad..dnt b scard of the fact that ppl wil tag u as "agony aunt" ofcourse they wil...let agony romance wth u completly...once its done it wil leave...

So..chill and lets celebrate sadness :) let it b satisfied..once it is done bade her a gudbye forever...

"Its a journey...and not a destination"

Love is a journey and not a destination!! Some days ago this sentence didnt really made sense to me.For me love was always a feeling neither a journey nor a destination.

i meet so many people..evry1 has his own definition 4 love...and each of these definition is just perfect.
Rite nw to me "love being a journey and nt destination" seems perfect.. :)
its a journey wr u knw a person daily and eventualy the realisation comes...thr is alws smthng abt dat person dat u wnt 2 knw more...

you see a person in his worst and u still want to love him ...u see him in his best and u just know ...u want to be with him
but i wonder ...how u really reach the person u want to take this journey with ..how do u know if he is the one ...how do you know if he is right.

and that is where the Magic happens. Magic where the most ordinary person becomes just so special , u just dont know y ....whn u stop at that person and u know nothing could have been better then this .

all of it sounds so whimsical but ask all those people who have been fortunate enough to have these feelings...... this is for real ...

Love happens ...the magic happens ....which leads us to that wonderful journey of life ..

:) :)

अधूरे पल.....

जब भी मैँ तुमसे मिलु, मन कहता है एक वो बात हो जो अधूरी रह जाए...
एक वो बात जो पूरी करने तुम आओगे ....ये एक उम्मीद एक आस मन में रह जाए..

वो रास्ता जहाँ तुम मिले थे...कहीं वहां वो एक अधुरा मोड़ हो जो मुझ तक लौट कर आये

जब भी तुम मुझे देखो..एक सवाल हो तुम्हारे मन में जो अधुरा रह जाए जिसका जवाब लेने आओगे तुम ये उमीद मेरे मन में रह जाए...

तुम आओगे कभी...ये नहीं जानती मैं...पर ये अधूरे पल,मुझे पूरा करते है...
मेरे अधूरे जीवन को सपने दखने की वजह देते है..

ये अधूरी बातें मुझे तुमसे जोडती है..तुम अब भी हो...हमेशा रहोगे एक उम्मीद बनकर ॥
मेरे जीवन का एक वो सपना , एक वो उद्देश्य ......जो पूरा होगा कभी एक ऐसी आस बनकर ।

The fairy tale life

Some one told me thrs a difference betwn wt u percieve about urself and what you actually are.

But dnt we all live in a virtual world or atleast wish to live in dat world. Aint we all trying to be what we wish to be rather than what we are, striving for a better life always . Dont we all wish for a perfect life which seems like a "fairy tale" .yes,by saying
"all" i m also including those "practical" people who just stay rooted to ground and do not shut their eyes to the brutal world.(most of us are like dat) but in the process of being "real" dnt we just miss to see dat life is beautiful.

Isnt ths "fairy tale" perception of ours give us the strength of just moving on..belive in love..belive in trusting people u dnt knw...creating a perfect world for urself...

Each one of us come across nasty people..and gud people as well but y do we label the whole world as nasty...y do we stop appreciating love because one person broke ur heart...y do we presume thr is no truth left bcoz sum1 is untruthful...y do we create boundaries...y do we shut dat door wch takes us to the fairy tale world..

Y dnt we just apreciate life..we gt decieted so that we can value trust,our heart breaks so dat we can value love...

Its al abt hw u percieve ur life 2 b..that fairy tale life exists for real...u just have to come out of ur boundaries, inhibitions and perceptions...to embrace that life...

डब्बों में सिमटी ज़िन्दगी !

हर सुबह उठकर जब मैं सूरज की किरणे ढूंढती हूँ,
एक डब्बे से झांकती हुई हिचकिचाती सी किरण मुझसे मिलने आती है।
मैं उसे बाहों में भरना चाहती हूँ , पर वो डर जाती है,
कहती है, जैसे में इस डब्बे में सिमट गई हूँ , वो वैसे खोना नहीं चाहती,
एक टुकड़ा नहीं उसे पूरा आसमान चाहिए, खुद को पहचान सके कम से कम ऐसा एक जहाँ चाहिए।


जब मैं हरी ज़मीन का आँचल ओढना चाहती हूँ, वो खुद में सिमट जाती है,
डब्बों के इस जंगल को वो समझ नहीं पाती है,
मैं उसमे खुद को समां लेना चाहती हूँ , पर वो मुझसे दूर चली जाती है,
कहती है , मेरे जैसे वो खुद को बांध नहीं सकती
उसे अपना आंचल सारे जहाँ में फैलाना है,
नाकि बटें हुए इन बंद डब्बों में सिमट कर अपना अस्तित्व खोना है।

जब मैं उस पंछी के साथ गुनगुनाना चाहती हु, वो चुप हो जाती है,
इन डब्बों में बसे उस दबे हुए शोर की आवाज़ वो समझ नहीं पाती है ।
मैं उसके गीतों को अपना बनाना चाहती हूँ, पर वो मेरे अन्दर कोई संगीत देख नहीं पाती है,
कहती है , मेरी तरह इन डब्बों में बसे शोर में वो खुद के सुरों खो नहीं सकती,
उसके गीत सारे जहाँ में गूंजते जाएँगे,
मेरे इन  डिब्बों के शोर में तो, वो कहीं दूर खो जाएँगे ।

इस डब्बों के शहर में क्या पाया मैंने,
ना मुझे अँधेरे से जगाने वाली किरण मेरे पास है,
इन डब्बों में बसी उन ठंडी भावनाओ से खुद को बचा पाऊं ना उस ज़मीन के आँचल को ओढने की आस है,
सब भूलकर गुनगुनाऊ वो गीत भी ढूंढ नहीं पाती हूँ, डब्बों में बसे उस डरे हुए शोर में ऐसे उलझ कर रह जाती हूँ ।

काश के एक दिन ये डिब्बे ढह जाएं ,
इन डब्बों के अन्दर बसे वो मुर्दा जिस्म इंसान बनकर बहार आयें,
सूरज की किरणों को बाहों में भरकर, इस ज़मीन के आँचल में सिमट पाएं .
वो गीत जो खो गए हैं, उनके सुरों को मिलाकर एक नया गीत गुनगुनाऐं ।

Shit ! I fell in love again…(and again …& again…..& again…)

What is the right age to fall in love ? or how many times you can fall in love ?are there any laws applicable to fall in love ??

Ridhi was 16….no 15….hmmm 12… I guess 10 ..NNNaaa...8 years old when she fell in love (for the first time :P). her first love was that cute little boy in his class sitting next to the window, who seemed to be eternally silent .

She always wished if someday her god fairy wud come and grant her wish of sitting besides him and one fine day the magic happened . the class teacher (and not god fairy ) granted her wish.How could she ever forget those endless chit chatting in between classes, sharing the lunch box , fights which never lasted more than an hour,she was so excited ….oh! she had a boyfriend now…:D but all good things come to an end.her father was transferred to another city and she had to end her love story (or so she thought) . she was heart broken.but she always believed dat one day he wil find her (but she didnt leave a shoe behind so he cudnt ;))

She was 12 not interested in boyfriends anymore but one fine day she noticed that the tall guy from the next section was looking at her .she tried to ignore him, but alas! By then she had been hit by cupid’s arrow already. Shit! She was smiling to herself again but she knew last time she was just a kid and this time she is a “grown up kid”. But , within a year she realised she has responsibilities on her head like homework, tutions etc etc.so she sacrificed her love to the education system . but she was haunted by the memories of those sweet talks, sharing of notes, passing chits etc etc.and again she decided she will "never - ever" fall in love :)

But alas ! one fine day she reached that age of mandatory romance according to the parameters of Bollywood .How could she breach the laws of the holy bollywood. she was sweet "16" (remember all those sola baras ki bali umar kinda songs :D ) so she had to fall in love again. But this time it was serious and it was "true love".that athletic , wannabee,girl's most wanted, school captain stole her heart.they shared those beautiful moments in love for 2 years..she was happy.but they had 2 part their ways one day..school days were over and they went to different colleges.slowly she realised those feelings have faded..but those memories remained..she just fell out of love.but she was happy she had loved.it was a wonderful feeling.

It was her first year at college.it was month of december she was enjoying her tea.and suddenly she noticed "him".he was just so lost in his world not interested in anyone.she just wanted to look at him and she was sure he wil never look back..for next few days she made sure she was always in canteen at that time of the day but never expected he wil even notice.but one fine day a friend told her dat "he" wants to meet her.she was scared.they met 4 the first time and she felt as if her heart has just skipped a beat.it was beautiful.they were so happy 2gthr.they had so much to share with each other even wn they were silent.with each passing day she realised with him she can just fall in love every day..
it was raining heavily and they were on the middle of the road..and he kissed her for the 1st time.she was speechless..time had stopped at dat moment.She knew she wanted to be with him forever.

Years passed by but she still loved him the way she did the first day. (so she thought).she was insanely in love with him.and she loved it. it was beautiful

But she cud hint that things were changing .she cudnt see that spark in his eyes.but she ignored those thoughts.it was too bitter to accept.

But she cudnt holdon to things for long.this relation was slipping away 4m her hand like sand..but she just dint want to let go..

They switched to different cities.and she realised slowly she was nt thr in his life any more..she broke completely.

For some days al those sad songs made sense.there was somethng she was holding on to.but one day she decided she wil let go..she was hurt..but slowly realised its just human to fall out of love.and he did.

That day she decided she wil never give up on love.its a wonderful feeling and no one should miss it.. :-).
One day she wil just fall in love again.

In one life we can have many love stories.its not wrong.its human.dont restrict urself.fall in love enjoy it.dont draw boundaries to ur feelings..love truely and deeply ..u may get hurt or u may fal out of it but dat is the only way u wud hav lived life.

Love is a beautiful fèeling .dont miss it..find it :-)

The language of silence !!!

It was a just another evening for me . I was on my way back home as usual cribbing about how bad the day at office was and all the things that have gone wrong in life.Feeling unhappy about the fact that every one around me is so happy and complaining that why only i have to deserve all the wrong things in life.

I was just loitering around observing all the happy faces and feeling even more miserable. Suddenly i saw a young boy and a girl completely unaware and indifferent to the outside world.Happy and smiling and completely immersed in each other.In the first look i presumed they are just another stereotypical "madly in love " kind of a couple. But , on a closer look i realised that they were not silent, they were talking to each other in sign language.i realised that they could neither speak nor hear each other.

They were "special" . NO! not special according to the modest lingo of the so called normal people like me , They were really special .Because they were the most content most happy faces amongst that crowd. As if they have everything in life.

It came to me as a tight slap on my face.Because few days back i wanted to help those "special" people. But today at that moment i was face to face with the reality which all of us ignore. I have ignored always.

These are not the people who need help. We are the ones who need serious help, we are the ones who need to learn from them. Today i realised that all of us so called normal people are weak, so weak that we dont even have the courage to acknowledge that.

Life is beautiful depends on how we look at it.I see people falling in love ,I see kids smiling ,group of friends just sitting and chit chatting, mother pampering kid , husband romancing his wife , an old couple enjoying each other as if they are on their first date :)
But i just "see" these moments, i dont observe i dont let these beautiful moments sink in .

With all our eccentricities we just miss observing all these wonderful moments...we just fail to appreciate what we have.
lets just open our arms and embrace life. live life in each moment :)it's actually beautiful.

I am sharing what 'I Saw and I Learnt' at BlogAdda.com in association with DoRight.in.

lets be stupid :) :)

Sometimes it’s just fine to concentrate on the” stupid things” in life .... they might be the weirdest , craziest, most bizarre things. 

Sometimes let's just do things not approved or understood by others, because in those moments you will live life to the fullest without any inhibitions, expectations and fear of losing .

Amongst all those important things we think about, career, money, relations lets just take out time to concentrate and think about the stupid things of life.

Ever thought why you don’t ever forget or regret the first time you bunked the school, the first time you kissed in the middle of the road, the first time you fell in love, you got drunk, winked at the girl next door (and may be got slapped too :P), punched the big fat guy, played with an unknown kid on street, just spoke to that charming guy u daily stare at in the bus .because in those moments you have just lived life :)

There will be always that one thing in your life which is not fine, there will be always one minute in the day that will make you frown, there will always be dat one person in your life who will break your heart. There will always be one dream that will not come true…

 Amongst all these unending disappointments let's just create space for stupidity….lets not be matured lets just enjoy life .. lets be stupid