Love finds a way <3<3

They said, one day in my heart love will find a way.

I didn't believe them until i met you that day

I thought it's a fairy tale and will end anyway 

But, every morning when you stroke my hairs, hold my hands look into my eyes, that very moment i fall in love with you every day !

Caged

You are caged,

In the facade that you created
With those plastic smiles, the vanity bags 
and the faces so diligently painted

In the frenzy to win the never ending rat races
The need to be validated, the need to be accepted

You smile when you want to laugh and you hide when you want to cry.
You talk things, things about politics, may be fashion or sports or whatever
But, never your heart, Never !

You wake up every morning to make a living but never to make a life.

You strive and strive harder by every passing day to create a life which is approved by them.
Yes Them, the neighbours, the aunts, the boss, the friend, that cousin...you don't know them.

You log in and logout just to be present, 
and not to really "connect"

You marry, you bear kids, earn money and thats all you do, 

because they say that's all you are supposed to.

You pray but you don't believe.

You point those fingers at the demons outside,but don't ever dare to look inside.
You put up a brave face, when you are actually scared.

You achieve glory at the pretense, of being radical.

While you don't look beyond what has been shown, 
you chicken out at the thought of doing beyond what has been done.

What if I tell you, there is no one looking, 
NO ONE !!

No one cares how you look, talk,what you do, don't do.

No one is looking, listening, judging

It doesn't matters really..

Will you still wear that plastic smile.

Carry on with relations u suffer, stick to that job you despise

Will you still hide when you want to cry.

Will you still put up that brave face when you are scared deep inside.

Will you restrain or jump and dance out of joy.

You know what? It doesn't matter really it doesn't.

You are just another minuscule particle 

of this vast very very vast universe.

No one cares 

And one day you will disappear 

just like smoke as if you were never there.

So breathe, at least breathe

Fill up you lungs with life.

It's not time yet.

You can't be dead...
not now..

You have to live once at least once before you are really dead.

  

Women's day - are we really ready for celebrations?

She doesn't pray anymore though she lives next to the "yellamma" temple. She lost her virginity when she was 13. She fell in love once but soon realised its too fancy an indulgence for her. She is the only "man" in the family of 5. But fears that she would no longer be there.....

She is suffering from HIV. She is a Devdasi - Prostitute of GOD!!!

Intimading and sacrilageous right??? But sadly its the truth that prevails at a much larger scale than we expect.

The devdasi culture is a perfect example of the disgusting hypocrisy that exists in our society. A society where we worship female deities in temples but are perfectly fine with commoditising women in every possible way - ads for men's deo, toothpaste, biscuits, cement, where women in skimpy clothes are extremely necessary (product is irrelevant as long a half naked women is there),we enjoy chikni chameli, and munni badnam with women dancing to detogatory lyrics. ( how does that matter that's our favourite party song)

Devdasi culture is another example of the levels to which a section of society can go down to in the name of religious rituals where parents turn pimps and hundreds of innocent girls are forced to become prostitutes in the name of GOD.

(To know more about devdasi culture click here)

http://youtu.be/LB05RUezvNc

On 8th march we will celebrate the "commercialisation of womenhood". We will go for our office sponsored lunches, like status updates on women's day share quotes on empowering women. Happily oblivious of the sect of women for whom being a women is a bane and not a boon, women who don't even get the fundamental right of being a human leave alone being a women. 

But who cares? celebrating women's day is important in our lives with our metro sexual partners, stable careers, bank balances, supportive families, an equal status as our male counter parts and freedom of choice on allmost everything.

All of us have got our fair share of status and freedom in the society. We are already celebrating our womenhood every day we don't need a special day.

The day when each and every women gets the respect she deserves, when we the fortunate and empowered section of women step ahead and give our support to the less fortunate women and bring them to the same level. The day when a ritual like devdasis no more exists. That day we as a society deserve to celebrate women's day in its true sense.

Milaap is one such organisation which is helping these women. This women's day lets make our small contribution to help these women.

http://milaap.org/campaigns/hope 

Friends forever

They fell in love, got married
and lived happily ever after....
But not together

They were now best friends

The lost friend

Trying to search the benches of the classroom, the cards kept in that old envelope the laughter hanging in memories, the secrets kept safely deep in my heart

 Hoping to find you somewhere again some day....

 my lost friend

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.

Every weekend, we give out creative writing topics for the bloggers who love to write.

Insanity!

she couldn't understand were they insane?
They threw stones at her, some were blabbering something incoherently, some one even tried to tear her already torn sari.

Has she come to an asylum accidentally !

And suddenly she felt the pain in her head, slowly  the sounds were fading away.
the last thing she heard was

"she is mad, take her away"

The treat!

The kids were gleeful while deciding what should they eat first
The burgers the noodles or the cake.

They couldn't hold there excitement any more and finally they dived....

into the dustbin!

कभी कभी यूँ ही मुड़कर उन खंडहरों में घूम आती हूँ,

ऐसा नही उसे फिरसे बसाने का अरमान है। 

पर, उन टूटी फूटी दीवारों के बीच ज़िंदगी हँसती थी कभी,

वहाँ जहाँ मकड़ी के जाले हैं अब, सपने बस्ते थे कभी,

वो उजड़ा सा बगीचा रंगों से खेलता था कभी,

उन धूल से भरी तस्वीरों में मुस्कुराते लम्हे बस्ते थे कभी,

मैं तो वहाँ बस अपने ज़िंदा होने का एहसास करने चली जाती हूँ

उस बर्बाद खंडहर से इतनी मोहब्बत थी कभी , 

की अब उसकी बर्बादी पे रोना नही आता,

बस एक सकून है की वो अब भी खड़ा है वहीं

...and you are still there but..

At the stroke of midnight we met after what seemed like ages.
You caressed my cheeks Brushed away the stroke of hairs dancing on my face.
You wanted to look at my face without any distraction.

We laughed and talked for hours. You said I never looked as beautiful ever. You came near I could feel the warmth of your breath.
I closed my eyes.....

When I opened my eyes...you were still there sleeping besides me.
Not even acknowledging my existence.....

The night was cold. The warmth of your touch was not there.
And I realised...It was just a dream.

A drop of tear trickled down from the corner of my eyes.
You are still there....sleeping or are you awake???

A question I ask every night to myself...surprised at the audacity of my dreams, which still make way.
may be even you want to know...am I asleep or still awake. Do I still dream




This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda

Those were the best days of my life

It Was the first day my tiny feet ventured to a new world outside
my eyes met yours, and you smiled.
we shared our dolls, ran in the parks and after rains enjoyed that wet mud..
But soon we were apart, and knew the time wont return
Your memories were the only reason I could smile..
I looked back and said - Ah those were the best days of my life.

I was lonely, and thought no one understands, and I met you.
You offered a cup of tea and we talked.
We shared those crazy dreams, whispered those secret thoughts. 
Together we Laughed like insane
We cried for heart breaks and reasons simply lame.
And one day you left, you had bigger dreams to chase.
Time passed by but our crazy laughter still remains.
I pause and look back sometimes 
and say ah..those were the best days of my life.

One day you came searching for me.
I was busy running behind the lifeless luxuries, 
I thought I had no time to waste.
I couldn't see you the fog of ambitions Made my Vision dazed.

Today,the fog has cleared
And I find none near.
I pause, look back and wish time did not fly.
I often pass by those,moments and say.
Ah..those were the best days of my life

‘Tring- Tring, the phone rang…!’

‘Tring- Tring, the phone rang…!’
She was scared to pick up the phone, 17 years ago on a day like this the phone rang to give her the news of captain ranjeet's death.
They had known each other since the first day of college, and fell in love almost instantaneously.
Adi, their son was 5 years old when the news came.
She didn't know what should she explain to adi.
But somehow adi understood, she cried the whole night holding him and he quietly hugged her.
At 21 adi Said - ma I want to join the army..she was shocked.
She fell silent for few mins, not knowing what to say.
Finally she uttered - ok beta, may lord Shiva always be by your side.
It has been over 15 days there has been no news from him. Last words she heard from him were - ma I miss the methi parathas, will come soon to savour them love you.
26th July 1982, was when Adi's dad died in a MIG plane crash, and today 26th July 1999, again the phone rang.
She picked up the phone with shivering hands and the voice on the other side Said - " ma we won, make methi parathas, will come home tommorow".
She was speechless yet again, tears of joy flowing through.
But suddenly, the tears of joy turned into tears of agony, knowing hundreds of mothers, haven't been,as lucky as her.
Silently she prayed for all the brave sons who sacrificed their lives in kargil.
She knew it won't be long enough when she will be dreading another phone call.
She wished that some day the phone rang and the voice on the other side Said -"the war is over , forever and ever"

...and I blushed..<3

It was raining that evening we met for the first time..
U looked into my eyes
and I blushed
you too were a little shy...
One day u gently took my hand, asked me to be forever yours..
And I blushed..
We knew our lives r taking another course
Standing near the pyre of fire we were taking vows..
And I blushed
I looked at u and I knew I couldn't have been loved any more
A part of you was breathing inside me, you kissed my forehead..
And I blushed. .
You had tears in your eyes,
you will always  be by my side, that day u had said.
Years went by, ur hands were frail..
But u still held my hand tight
You hugged me and Said how beautiful I looked that night
I saw u smiling, but your smile was getting blurred
And I blushed
With my last breath, that moment for the last time..

दिल करता है फिरसे पापा की गुड़िया बन जाऊं,

थके हारे जब लौटे पापा, अपनी छोटी - छोटी हथेलियों से उनका माथा सहलाऊं।

कड़कती सर्दियों में पापा की शौल में लिपटे हुए,

उनकी गोद में ही सो जाऊं।

माँ जब डांटे किसी बात पर ,

तो पापा के पास अर्ज़ी ले जाऊं।

पापा के साथ नुक्कड़ की उस दूकान पे जाकर,

मनमानी कर खूब सारी चॉकलेट ले आऊं।

बहुत हुआ ये खेल बडों का,
दिल करता है बस अब पापा की गुड़िया बन, उस चौखट फिर लौट जाऊं।

बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी,
सड़क किनारे झगड़े थे जब हम,तर बतर पानी में भीगते हुए
कभी रूठते , कभी मनाते ,सरसराती ठण्ड से  कांपते हुए।

बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी ,
जब एक  छोटी सी छतरी लेके मैंने तुमको घर तक छोड़ा था ,
वो अदना सी छतरी  बारिश के तेज़ झोंके रोक सके इतनी कहाँ औकात थी उसकी,
वो तो तुम्हारे साथ चंद लम्हे चुराने का एक बहाना  था।

बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी,
जब तुम मिलने नहीं आये थे,
खिड़की के किनारे बारिश की बूंदों से खेलते हुए ,
न जाने कितने घंटो हमने फ़ोन पर, बातें करते हुए बिताए  थे।

बारिश वाली एक शाम आज भी है पर ,
अब हम झगड़ते नहीं है,
अदना सी वो छतरी आज भी है कहीं, पर अब हम साथ चलते नहीं है।
अब हम साथ में बारिश को साथ में बैठकर तकते ज़रूर है,
पर करने को बातें नहीं है।

बारिश वाली वो शाम तो आज भी आई है,
पर बूंदों में अब वो बात नहीं है।

हर वक़्त लगता है की कुछ कीमती सा खो गया गया है ,

ढूँढने निकलती हूँ  जब , तो क्या खोया मैंने समझ नहीं आता  है 

लगता है जैसे वो किताब जो पढ़नी  शुरू की थी मैंने , वो अब भी अधूरी है ,

पर पन्ने  छानती हूँ जब तो वो खोया हुआ जुमला कहीं मिल नहीं  पता है 

लगता है जैसे अरसों हुए घर लौटे ,

घर की तरफ निकलती  हूँ जब तो लौट  जाने का रास्ता नज़र नहीं आता है

कभी हँसते - हँसते एक आंसू पलकों पर उतर आता है,
फिरसे मुस्कुराने की कोशिश करती हूँ जब , तो वो हँसता सा लम्हा याद नहीं आता है।

इंसानों की इस बस्ती में, इंसानों ने ही मोल ना पाया,
पत्थरों को भगवान बनाकर, चार दीवारों में छुपाया,
भूल गए हम, खुले आसमानों में उड़ने वाले उस पंछी को भी ईश्वर ने ही बनाया।

फल, फूल, दूध, दही का चढ़ावा उस पत्थर को चढ़ाया,
इंसानों की भूख को भूल गए हम, जिसको उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।

इन पत्थरों के नाम पर हर दिन का एक रंग बनाया ,
भूल गए हम इस संसार के हर एक रंग को उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।

पत्थरों से बनी उस देवी को, कपड़ो, गहनों से सजाया,
भूल गए करना उस औरत का सम्मान जिसको उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।

पत्थरों  का धर्म बनाकर, उस एक दूजे का खून बहाया ,
भूल गए हम हर इंसान को एक सा, उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।

इंसानों की इस बस्ती में इंसानों ने ही मोल न पाया,
पत्थरों  की पूजा करते करते, ईश्वर के बनाये उस इंसान ने,
अपने अन्दर के इंसान को ही गंवाया।

एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश........

कहीं दिल के कोने में दबी।

झांकती हुई एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ......

आसमानों में उड़ने की नहीं,

 पर अपनी सी लगे जो, 

उस एक टुकड़े ज़मीन को पाने की।

एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ......

सूरज के उजाले को छोड़कर ,

एक अपना सिर्फ अपना खामोश अँधेरा सा  कोना  ढूँढने की। 

एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं .....

अपने आस पास की मुस्कुराहटों से दूर जाकर 

एक छोटी सी मुस्कराहट अपने अन्दर ढूँढने की।

एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ....

दूसरों की आशाओं को भूलकर 

थोड़ी देर के लिए ही सही,पर खुदगर्ज़ हो जाने की।

nirbhaya !! the invincible

Nirbhaya you did not die...
you live inside me
asking me why...


why were you told u could dream...
why were you told you could fly..
why were you told you were free..
To explore the world, to reach the sky....

Nirbhaya you shake me deep inside...
Ask me the first time I was disgraced y dint I fight...
Y did I not stand up for my rights....
Y did i choose to be meek and in that took pride..

I was a daughter, a sister ,wife and a mother but above all i was a creator...
Y did i not respect me...
Y i did not celebrate the birth of me.

Nirbhaya i see me in you...u did not die
Why i believed i am not meant to touch the sky...
Why i chained myself why i did not try..

Nirbhaya you woke me up from ages of slumber
you suffered for my sins...
You suffered because I dint speak...
U suffered because I was weak...

Nirbhaya u dint die...
U have started this fight...
You will stay always in my heart....
Reminding me always I m here not just to exist,but to survive

Nirbhaya you r that part of me which will stand for me...
You r that part of me which will value me
You r that part of me which will voice my opinion.
You r that part of me which will remind me I am a human..

Nirbhaya you dint die....
You r the invincible me...Who will defy,question,fight...
Will not submit to what isn't right.

Inside me you will always be alive...
Nirbhaya you will never die...

Shadows of love .....

there are no strings attached anymore

when i look back , only shadows of love remain...

no longer i feel i have known you ever 

something has gone dead inside,

never to return

all that remains are shadows of love

which mean nothing anymore

i am pained i am fatigued ,

trying to collect peices of me that fell apart

not sure of whats the truth 

that remains with me today 

or the shadows of love getting blurred away

there 's a war inside deciding whether to fogive or forget

faking a smile hiding a tear ,scared but walking ahead .

holding on to the shadows of love that remain

That Thing called Love !

As a  teenager  I always wondered how is it to Fall in love with some one insanely. I actually visualised myself singing those around the tree songs and playing with curtain in moonlit terrace songs :).I actually imitated some :P.

its been almost a year since i got married and some how all that dreamy fairy tale world has vanished only to emerge as a more beautiful one .

with you i realised love is not aboult saying it aloud its about those subtle things you do for me .

i know its love when you hold my hand when we cross roads even when there is no traffic.

love is when you wake up in middle of the night and stroke my hairs , i know you do that even if i pretend i am asleep.

love is when you scold me to eat more.

love is when i am worried and you just look at me and i know it will be fine.

love is when i dont remember your bday and you still kiss my forehead telling me i am the best thing that could have happened to you.

love is when you came that night after a booz party with friends half drowsy and you told me all you could think about was me.

love is when you want my dreams to come true more than i want.when you motivate me to keep trying.

love is when you scold me for not picking up your call for too long coz you got worried.

love is when you looked back at the air port knowing that i am sad and you couldnt help it.

love is when i cuddle up with you while asleep after a fight and you hold me tight.

love is when you wanted to do the dishes with me.

love is when you play my favorite radio channel in the car instead of yours.

love is when you watch a hindi movie with me even when you wanted to watch a hollywood action movie.

love is when you are damn tired and you still drove double the distance because i wanted to go to Mc D.

Love is just being with you and knowing that nothing else means to you as much as i do.

Welcome to the "Silicon City" !!

It was an exciting ride to the bangalore "international" airport at midnight... starlit sky, smooth road (ok not really) a traffic less drive and of course a long awaited arrival of my hubby made it even more wonderful.
We reached a little early ,the flight was delayed and his baggage was last to arrive. All Together I had enough time at my disposal. I thought of taking a tour of the airport which is said to be getting better day by day.Delighted by the numerous eateries around i decided to grab a coffee and fetch a place to sit.while I was searching for a place to sit and enjoy my coffee. 
I was surprised to spot some unexpected visitors the - stray dogs !

Cursing the authorities of not being vigilant enough I moved away in search of a better place to sit. I looked all around and was disgusted at the site. Dustbins were overflowing, food was littered under the tables making it a midnight buffet venue for the dogs around.
To make situations worse there was an overflowing crowd of people waiting for their kith and kin at the arrivals, Impatiently and shamelessly standing just after the board written "visitors not allowed"

I wanted to run away, I was so appalled but maximum I could go do was go to the loo and later  curse myself for not being able to hold on to call of nature for sometime as the washroom was in a even more pathetic condition. Stinking washroom, open taps ,wet floors. Yuck! is the only word I can think of.
I was shocked , disgusted , disappointed ,worried all at the same time. Any international airport is not just a venue to board flights or see off friends and family it has a larger role to play it's the entry point for anyone entering first time to the country.
 It's the first impression that any outsider gets (I hope and pray that it's not the last one) about us.

Of Course the authorities should be blamed for their negligence and irresponsibility. But isn't it also the fault of ours .we are not civilised enough. We don't follow basic sanitation etiquettes , we don't want to follow rules ,we don't know how to judiciously use public property. Sometimes I really feel that are we eligible enough to stay in developed country or even be a part of the progress. Are we qualified enough to govern ourselves?

I dont have a solution to these issues,but I try to do my bit by following traffic rules, not littering, respecting queues .

I hope some day all of us do our bit,make our country a better place and proudly welcome other parts of the world to our country, our state and proudly tell them "welcome to  silicon city of India. 

A picture is worth thousand words.True..yesterday while i was somberly surfing through the net suddenly stumbled upon this picture..a 96 years old (or shall i say young ) armenian lady with AK47 protecting her house.The very first emotion that ran across my mind was pity..but then a closer look gave goose bumps... seriously! Those eyes were not to be pitied but meant to be revered...the
Valor across that face..gave me chills across the spine..i dont know the conditions which put her into that situation,but i know the determination was something to be learnt from. We with all the luxuries are insecured ,scared all the time..we give up on everything easily.We crib about the system and struggle daily but we dont stand up to fight. We are scared of our country men, we submit to the situations but we dont change them.. We are insecured about almost everything and scared about everything jobs, relations , society etc etc.
we are struggling to save everything,secure everything.
at 96 years when people loose interest in life,this women is safeguarding her house like a tigress , she is not scared, she is determined.may be her hands are fragile,may be they cant even bear the weight of the gun she is holding.But the strength in her eyes is worth a salute.I hope we all had that courage , that strength to meet adversities

Some "English vinglish" lessons :)

After a long long time here comes a movie not just worth spending ur money but also spending some time thinking about it....,1 day past and I m still spell bound ...those subtle but very strong messages still echoing in my head :)

1) love what u do no matter what it is..without the slightest expectation of any kind of admiration ...put your heart into it .some day ur work (wtever it might be) will be an examples to others,like shashi's laddoos.

2) there is no age of learning and. Enjoying life...its one life live it ur ways.

3) spend time with urself ,retrospect,criticise,appreciate urself for who u r....

4) love ur family....they will never let u down...nor should u let them down ever.

5)no matter who understands you and who doesnot...its important to know ur self/ respect ur self...if u dnt then no one will

6) stay connected to your roots..always no matter what you become.

6) the best message "love ur self" and u will love everything about your life....

in those dark woods..i was walking alone ...

searching for a way..searching for a dawn!

i was wounded , i was torned ...

ways were tough , thr was no strength to move on...

far away somewhere i saw a light...

hesitant i moved ahead yet hopeful of respite....

it was sunshine ..not dark anymore ....

love embraced me and i could feel no pain , no remorse...

i closed my eyes , elated and feeling secure..

i rose above every fear, to feel the love dats so pure...

now every step i take ahead, i am no longer alone...

love shows me the way holding my hands taking me along...

love is panacea for all  woes all  distress,

love teaches you to live,stand strong be selfless...

its love thats above everything...agony ,selfishness, ego and  rage..

its love that gives reason to live its the ultimate salvage..........

fight for love, fear its loss,give it all you can dont loose it ever...

coz, its only love that will give us strength, placate the unscathed ways , make u smile and will stay in your heart for eternity...for ever..........

It isnt smooth ,but  it isnt tough either ...
you can hurt me, but you cant break me...


the more it gets harder ...
the more it makes me stronger ...


i will not perish , for i am here to survive ...
i will not vanquish , for i am here to fight...


i will fall, but that wont halt my way to the sky....
i will fail  , but that wont deter my spirits to try...


i am my strength,and i am my inspiration...
its me i believe ...i need no commiseration...


walk along with me ..and hold me when i stumble...
but dont decide my path...for i will have my own experiences even if i crumble....

appreciate me for me...for this is what i am ...
if i change ..i wont love..i wont fight ...i wont dream..i wont try ....

if i loose me.. i loose u ...

coz  i am me ...i am capable of  ..loving you

coz i am me i am capable of appreciatieng you ....

coz i am me i am with you ...

Bleeding Blue !!!!

empty roads ... smooth traffic....no client calls ....excitement , preparations and celebrations........
seemed like i am back to the school sports tournament days...every one excited... high spirits all over .......today the entire India was one team.....

I am not a cricket fan..somehow could never take interest in the sport.But today i watched it through out without blinking eyes...shouting , cheering , praying ...for "my team".
no , i have not become a fan of the game...but i have become a die hard fan of we indians....the spirit of india...

the only religion that unites us "cricket ". today we had the same prayer & we were all Bleeding blue :)

the pressure the tension was boiling up in the cafeterias and nt at the work stations....and
outside those showroom and shops wr ppl were peeping in to see that big lcd to knw the scores...

irrespective of creed,caste,religion,gender,designations...we had the same slogans...and ofcourse the same slangs.. against the opponents...

The chai wala outside the ofc and the sr.mgr, the auto wala and the mgmt trainee,the grl who never spoke and the liftman we all were 2gthr cheering 4 "our team"

the only conversations heard over phones were "score kya hua"

"madam..india jeet jaega" the auto wala said while dropin me home...as if reassuring me and himself...somewr confident and smwr tensed at the same time...

Thank GOD and all those dropped catches...we won! I,my neigbour ,that autowala,the chai wala,my boss,his boss WE ALL WON !!!
We all r different..we fight over my state and ur state and stil share the same lunch box...we try so hard to luk western and cool and stil pay those extra bucks 4 ghar ka khana...bargain 4 evry posible thing...and stil spend ostentiously 4 celebrating the newly bought microwave.. we are amazing...

We have different colors but al of us bleed saffron,white and green end of teh day ...and this time the newly found color of the nation we all "bleed blue"...

One Last Call !!!

Ridhi was standing on her terrace, staring at the wide horizon of the sky....wondering if any of these stars has the answer to her questions..if any of these stars can turn the wheel of time back...

Neither had she looked so beautiful in her life ...nor had she been so shattered ....

Wearing her bridal dress.. today she was standing on the thresh hold of a new life.But, she was somewhere stuck between the past and the present ...

thinking ...Would her life have been any different if she would have made that "one last call"

Ridhi was 23 when she met ABIR..

It was a staurday evening ..ridhi was waiting for priya  ..abir came to drop priya. But he didnt even bother to look at ridhi...not even say a Hello...ridhi out of courtesy greeted him and he responded in a manner as if he was forced to do so ...

Ridhi had never met someone so arrogant..

Next week Ridhi planned a movie with Priya and was really dissapointed to see Abir...she was hoping against all hopes that he had just come to drop priya and how she hated priya for asking him to stay ...

But , that day she spoke to Abir for the first time and realised that there was something which was deep inside him .His eyes were so expressive it seemed as if they could see through her soul....

That night lying on her Bed she couldnt believe herself .....she was thinking about Abir....There was something really mesmerising about him....

her phone rang...

"hi"

It seemed as if her heart had skipped a beat but she managed to say ..

"Hi "

"Did you reach home safe ?"

"ya ! thanks for the concern"

"How come you are still awake? working ?"

How much she wanted to say  "No! thinking about you " but fnally she managed to say "just reading a book"

"which one ?"

" half a face "

"Must be  a feminist kind of a book "

"yes ! sort of ... but why ???"

"are you a feminist ?"

"No ! i am not .. I just respect my gender "

"Ha! all feminists say that "...and the argument went on ...

Next morning she met priya "priya he is worse than what i thought ...rude and a MCP dare not bring him again to meet me.

But ridhi was thinking about abir....

that night abir called her..she didnt pick up ..but then she thought it might be too rude and she called back determined to cut the conversation short .

but she didnt realise when the night had passed and they were still talking...

"Ridhi ..I am a scorpion .scorpions do not fall in love very easily ...but when they do they are very passionate and possessive "

next day ridhi was thinking ...what it would be like to fall in love with a person like Abir...

but next moment she discarded the thought thinking that she will never ever fall in love with a person like Abir....

But ..for next few days she couldnt get her mind off his thoughts ...she couldnt figure out why ?she wanted to call him but never did..but she waited for his call.....even he dint call...

But there was something stuck inside ridhi's mind she dint know what it was ...

One day Abir called up .

Hi ! how are you?

"I am good ...how about you ?"

y didnt you call up from so many days ?

because you didnt ...

Ridhi didnt know what to say ...but finally she managed "Abir i dont know  why ...it may sound insane ...but from past 1 week i have been thnking about you ...

"Ridhi i cant fall  in love "

"Abir i am not in love with you..and i will never even fall in love with you "

"Ma'am you will not even realise when you will fall in love with me"

"Abir you are thinking too much "

The next evening they met ...ridhi was happy ...she cherished each and every moment with abir...

she wanted to know him more...

She loved this feeling but she didnt want to accept that can be love...

she will never forget that evening it was raining heavily ..when abir called up "ridhi i want to meet you..where are you "

"i am in office "

it was pouring and abir was drowned ....ridhi was happy to see him but somewhere she could sense something is wrong.

Ridhi do you like me??

yes i do ...

what do you think about me abir ?

i dont know....you havent got into my mind space yet and i dont believe in love ...

Abir i still  believe in the fairy tales of life ..i believe in love ...it happens for all of us ..and one day it will happen for you too...

how much she wanted say "it has happened with me the moment i saw you "

"ridhi lets go home "

ridhi realised that abir was sad...but she didnt know why ..

abir will we meet again ??

lets see...bye !

ridhi could never figure out what happened that day ?why did he react like that?

she could never give  a logic to her feelings as well...

a week later she met priya ..

"priya did you meet abir ?"

"no, but i heard he has left the city "

Ridhi didnt know how to react ...but she felt as if she had lost something very precious....she loved thinking about abir ....she never expected abir to call back nor did she want him to be in his life ..there were no expectations...but she just wanted to know what happened that day ...

she thought of calling him many times but she couldnt...some times out of fear that he will not pick up...some times out of ego that why should she call if he doesnt bother ....

but abir never went out of her thoughts....she knew it wasnt love ...but something was incomplete in her life without him ....

slowly ridhi moved on ...she met samrat she liked him...but never did she feel anything like what she felt for  Abir ...

a part of her never moved on ....it always wondered how abir was...where he was.. what happened  that day ???

today she was getting married ......

holding that peice of paper which shook her from inside ...she was trying to understand why life had to play such a game with her ....

it was letter from Abir ...

that day morning priya gave it to her

"ridhi ....abir gave this letter for you when he was leaving this city ....he wanted me to give it to you when you will have no way to find him out...

Ridhi abir is no more ......

ridhi dint have the courage to read the letter ......but finally she did with her trembling hands......

"Ridhi i know i have hurt you ...i am sorry ...dat day i wanted to tell you

"i love you "

Ridhi i wish i cud confess my feelings to u holding ur hands and lukin into ur eyes...but i have no time ridhi...

I am suffering from aids...and by the time u get this letter i wont b thr..i wish i cud hold ur hand one last time...

But i wil b watching u always...

Ridhi the feelings u have for me..its love...accept it..

I told u.... ma'am u wil nt even realise wn u wil fall in love with me...

Ridhi i know u waited for me...i also waited for u..but i feared loosing you..i cud never summon the courage to reach you...i always wished if one day you would take that first step.. i wish i cud hav holded ur hand one last time...

Ridhi love is not about  being with a person..its abt feeling the presence of dat person in your life..a feeling dat completes you..

Ridhì your memories completed me...thanks for coming to my life...for making me realise how wonderful love can be...I Love you ...

tears were rolling down her eyes ...

"maa'm you will not even realise when you will fall in love with me

she fell in love....lost it ...that one moment changed her life forever ...

how she wished ..she would have taken that first step...she would have made that "one last call"

P.S. not every day someone makes your heart skip a beat..makes u smile without reason ...and when that person comes to your life dont loose him....no matter what role that person plays in your life ...for how long he stays with you....dont loose him ....always make that "one last call "

तुम्हें चाहने में एक सकून सा मिलता है कहीं...

तुम्हें  हासिल करू ऐसी भी मगर कोई तमन्ना नहीं ....

हर वक़्त के तुम्हारे इंतज़ार में एक मज़ा है कोई .....

तुम शायद कभी ना  आओ पर इस बात की भी  अब मुझे परवाह नहीं.........

एक अरसा हुआ जब तुम मिले थे ,तुम्हे तो शायद अब वो लम्हा भी याद नहीं .....

मेरा वक़्त तो लेकिन तुम्हे ढूंढता सा थम गया है वहीँ पर कहीं .........

कभी एक दर्द , कभी सकून दे जाता है तुम्हारा ख्याल....

दिल को एक यकीन सा है की तुम आस पास हो मेरे कहीं ना कहीं... 

कभी एक लम्हा मुस्कराहट,कभी एक लम्हा आसूं बनकर हर वक़्त साथ हो तुम मेरे....

ज़िन्दगी को तुम्हारे एहसास की अब आदत हो चली है कहीं न कहीं....