This blog is all about life through my eyes. judgements which change each day....some times immature some times profound....about a day that has gone extremely right...a day full of struggle..lessons learnt from the smallest things..a blog about life and all that makes life worth it...a blog about my life my ways...
Friday, January 16, 2015
Falling in love again :)
A book lover often falls in love with the characters. Sometimes these characters become friends, sometimes lover and sometimes you.
The most difficult are the times when you finish. Its like parting from a lover. It tears you apart.
But, even more disturbing part is when you go back to them.
They don't make you feel the way they once did. There is nothing more or nothing less.
Suddenly the realisation dawns upon you, that they never existed. Its like getting cheated upon.
But, the hopeless lover you are, you move on... only to fall in love and feel the agony of separation yet again and again...
Sunday, November 9, 2014
Interstellar effect !
Looking at the starlit sky she thought, that is what becomes of people who die, she will one day become one of those. But with a knot in her stomach she realized, she is just an infinitely miniscule part of a planet revolving around a star much smaller than the ones she spots every night. And suddenly the ridiculousness of every thing around dawns upon her.
The inconspicuousness of her existence, the fragility of what we deem permanent and the stupidity of our delusional perspectives.
The inconspicuousness of her existence, the fragility of what we deem permanent and the stupidity of our delusional perspectives.
Friday, October 31, 2014
What lies ahead ??
I think, we got it all wrong about the Maayans,
They were right, Yes ! Humanity ended,
if not humans.
Or else, what could be an explanation
for, the missing girls of Nigeria,
the kids shot in America.
The girl raped brutally, in that chilly december night.
and the girl killed , in the name of justice, for putting up a fight.
There are monsters all around, beheading humanity,
There are monsters inside, advocating insanity.
If God exists, may be he is furious,
hinting it to us, with the Tsunamis and Nilofers.
hinting it to us, with the Tsunamis and Nilofers.
Is there any hope?
Will we save us from us, before we collapse in the volcano of destruction
Or, will we survive to become a species, devoid of heart and brain
in the course of evolution.
Image source : http://www.signatureillustration.org/illustration-blog/wp-content/Cole_Thomas_The_Course_of_Empire_Destruction_1836.jpg
Saturday, October 25, 2014
At last they made love !!
Sometimes she was in ornate patterns,sometimes she had a vintage look which he adored so much.
Another day she would be just plain, plain white.
But nothing seemed to catch his attention.
Though sometimes he did come close very close to her. But just stroked her and went away, disappointed.
And some days, he will come close look at her with lust in his eyes, touch her, caress her and suddenly will get agitated. He tried making love to her, but in vain.
He tried, but could only hurt her. All he was able to do was give her scars.
At last, he would just look at her lying at the corner of the room, life less, misshapen, but he just couldn't help it.
But, today was a different day, he came closer, took her in his arms and gave her all he had. Today she felt complete, their union gave a meaning to her life.
Today, after months of block the writer was able to pen down some words in the diary.
Today, Finally the pen and the diary made love and poetry was born.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Just humans !
Sometimes I wonder,
May be, the world would have been a better place if we were all
Just humans
Not a man, nor a woman
Just humans
Not Hindus, neither Muslims nor Christians
Just humans
Not White, not Blacks, not Americans, not Asians
Just Humans
Mother Nature's beautiful creation,
Just humans
Saturday, June 21, 2014
आजकल हर सुबह पूछते हो तुम मुझसे
बड़ी थकी थकी सी लगती है आँखें तुम्हारी
शायद सोई नहीं हो रात भर !
हैरान हु मैं अपनी किस्मत पर,
खुश हूँ की चलो तुम्हे ख्याल तो आया मेरा,
या गम करूँ की मेरे तकिये का कोना जो गीला है आज फिर,
तुमने एक बार भी गौर नहीं किया उसपर
Translation
Every Morning, you ask me
why do my eyes look so tired.
amused at my fate,
I ask Myself
should I rejoice your attention.
or be anguished that, even today you did not notice the moist edges of my pillow
बड़ी थकी थकी सी लगती है आँखें तुम्हारी
शायद सोई नहीं हो रात भर !
हैरान हु मैं अपनी किस्मत पर,
खुश हूँ की चलो तुम्हे ख्याल तो आया मेरा,
या गम करूँ की मेरे तकिये का कोना जो गीला है आज फिर,
तुमने एक बार भी गौर नहीं किया उसपर
Translation
Every Morning, you ask me
why do my eyes look so tired.
amused at my fate,
I ask Myself
should I rejoice your attention.
or be anguished that, even today you did not notice the moist edges of my pillow
कभी - कभी कहानियां लिखती हूँ,
कुछ बीते हुए लम्हों को नया मोड़ देकर,
कुछ आने वाले कल के सपने सजाकर।
और इंतज़ार करती हूँ,
पर ना बीता हुआ पल बदलता है,
ना ही आने वाला कल सवांरता है ,
रह जाती है तो मेरी कहानियां,
जिनके साथ ख्यालों में ही सही, मेरे सपने मेरी उम्मीदें सांस लेती हैं ,
जिनके साथ शब्दों में ही सही, पर थोड़ी सी ज़िन्दगी जी लेती हूँ मैं !
Translation
Sometimes I write stories.
stories about the past with a new twist.
stories about the dreamy future.
and I wait...
But neither the past changes it's course.
nor the future seems any better.
But my stories remain
through them i live my dreams and my hopes don't die.
through them i feel alive at least for a while.
कुछ बीते हुए लम्हों को नया मोड़ देकर,
कुछ आने वाले कल के सपने सजाकर।
और इंतज़ार करती हूँ,
पर ना बीता हुआ पल बदलता है,
ना ही आने वाला कल सवांरता है ,
रह जाती है तो मेरी कहानियां,
जिनके साथ ख्यालों में ही सही, मेरे सपने मेरी उम्मीदें सांस लेती हैं ,
जिनके साथ शब्दों में ही सही, पर थोड़ी सी ज़िन्दगी जी लेती हूँ मैं !
Translation
Sometimes I write stories.
stories about the past with a new twist.
stories about the dreamy future.
and I wait...
But neither the past changes it's course.
nor the future seems any better.
But my stories remain
through them i live my dreams and my hopes don't die.
through them i feel alive at least for a while.
सोचती हूँ की ये ज़िन्दगी, शायद ऐसी ही होनी थी
इतना ही मिलता था शायद !
पर फिर भी लगता है
उस मोड़ पे जाकर देख आऊं एक बार !
कुछ सवाल जो छोड़ आई थी वहां,
शायद अब उनका जवाब मिल जाये !
Translations
sometimes i wonder,
may be this is what was suppose to happen.
may be this is what i was entitled to get.
but then i still feel.
may be i should revisit that turning of life.
the questions which i left unanswered there.
may be now i will get the answers for those
इतना ही मिलता था शायद !
पर फिर भी लगता है
उस मोड़ पे जाकर देख आऊं एक बार !
कुछ सवाल जो छोड़ आई थी वहां,
शायद अब उनका जवाब मिल जाये !
Translations
sometimes i wonder,
may be this is what was suppose to happen.
may be this is what i was entitled to get.
but then i still feel.
may be i should revisit that turning of life.
the questions which i left unanswered there.
may be now i will get the answers for those
Wednesday, June 18, 2014
अजीब होता है ये रिश्ते ,
रिवाज़ों और दस्तखतों के बीच में खो जाते हैं मायने ,
बंद दरवाज़ों के अंदर सिसकियाँ भरता है,
पर कोई खोलता नहीं दरवाज़े की कड़ी,
दो जिस्म तो मिल जाते हैं आपस में ,
लेकिन रूह को खबर तक नहीं होती !
और कुछ रिश्ते वो भी हैं होते
कभी कोई रस्म, कोई कागज़ का टुकड़ा कोई दस्तखत नहीं होता
पर, लगता है जैसे एक ही रूह को दो जिस्मों में भर दिया हो उसने।
लफ़्ज़ों की ज़रुरत नहीं होती, बस धड़कनें करती है बातें,
नाही कोई बंधन है होता, ना किसी को बांधने की चाहत है होती
होता है तो बस एक दूसरे के साथ होने का एहसास,
लम्हों से ज़िन्दगी नहीं होती,
हर एक लम्हे में ज़िन्दगी होती है !
Translations
These relationships are weird isn't it ?
meanings get lost between traditions and signatures.
it suffers and cries behind those closed doors,
but no one dares to open the door.
two bodies unite,
but souls remain as strangers.
but there are those relationships also,
no rituals, no signatures, no piece of paper is required.
but it seems like two bodies have a single soul.
words are not required.
when hearts have conversation.
there are no need of control, nor any restriction.
all that is there is feeling of togetherness and contentment.
life is no longer simply a collage of moments.
every moment is alive
and every moment has a life.
रिवाज़ों और दस्तखतों के बीच में खो जाते हैं मायने ,
बंद दरवाज़ों के अंदर सिसकियाँ भरता है,
पर कोई खोलता नहीं दरवाज़े की कड़ी,
दो जिस्म तो मिल जाते हैं आपस में ,
लेकिन रूह को खबर तक नहीं होती !
और कुछ रिश्ते वो भी हैं होते
कभी कोई रस्म, कोई कागज़ का टुकड़ा कोई दस्तखत नहीं होता
पर, लगता है जैसे एक ही रूह को दो जिस्मों में भर दिया हो उसने।
लफ़्ज़ों की ज़रुरत नहीं होती, बस धड़कनें करती है बातें,
नाही कोई बंधन है होता, ना किसी को बांधने की चाहत है होती
होता है तो बस एक दूसरे के साथ होने का एहसास,
लम्हों से ज़िन्दगी नहीं होती,
हर एक लम्हे में ज़िन्दगी होती है !
Translations
These relationships are weird isn't it ?
meanings get lost between traditions and signatures.
it suffers and cries behind those closed doors,
but no one dares to open the door.
two bodies unite,
but souls remain as strangers.
but there are those relationships also,
no rituals, no signatures, no piece of paper is required.
but it seems like two bodies have a single soul.
words are not required.
when hearts have conversation.
there are no need of control, nor any restriction.
all that is there is feeling of togetherness and contentment.
life is no longer simply a collage of moments.
every moment is alive
and every moment has a life.
Monday, June 16, 2014
Sunday, June 15, 2014
The day I lived her life!
Suddenly Ajit woke up and it was dark, really dark. He was floating in some kind of a liquid anchored to something.
"M I dreaming?" he thought. But then he could hear voices faint voices then becoming loud, louder. It was his Mom shouting at his wife - Anita.
"She would have again done something, that bitch either she gets rid of that girl in her stomach or this time i will definitely divorce her. But, where M i why cant I move?"
and then he saw his hands they were tiny really really tiny, half formed, he couldn't move. He felt so helpless.
And then he heard the sobs. It was Anita, he felt a hand caressing the wall he was attached to.
Anita was crying now crying loud and in between her sobs she was saying something
"Beti, I am sorry really sorry, I don't know if I will be able to save you.
I wish your dad understood. You are as much his part as mine. you are a bit of both of us.
How can I kill you. I have dreams so many dreams for you.I know you can make us proud as proud as a son would. But what can I do?"
And suddenly with a jerk ajit was upside down. he could hear loud - very loud voices.
This time it was his father, abusing Anita-
"GET UP! and come with us to the hospital. Get rid of this Girl right now."
She got up slowly very slowly.
Ajit was bleeding slowly it was painful very painful, slowly he was loosing consciousness.
And then he woke up, everything seemed fine, again he could hear voices it was the doctor he bribed to conduct the abortion for Anita.
"It can be dangerous for Anita, she can die if I try to do this now. I think we should wait till she recovers from this injury or it will be unnecessary legal trouble if she dies during the operation."
And then ajith realised, he has become his "unborn daughter" he is now inside Anita's womb.
His parents are trying to kill HIM !!
He tried to shout he couldn't. And then he again heard a voice, It was Anita.
"Don't worry beta God has saved you today from those demons, I will fight hard to save you don't worry I will take care of you. Ajit felt a sense of relief. He was praying in his heart, for anita to save his life some how."
and then he heard the melodious lullaby anita sang every night, which annoyed him so much otherwise. One day he even hit her badly because of that song.
But today it was soothing really soothing, slowly he slept off.
When he woke up it was bright he slowly opened his eyes and saw Anita sleeping besides him. he was back in his own body.
The line of tears were visible in the corners of Anita's eyes. May be she has been crying the entire night.
He saw her face closely after so many years, she looked sad, but she looked beautiful. He felt guilty. He stroked her hairs, tears flowing from his eyes. Anita woke up and saw Ajit in a shock, she couldn't understand what was happening.
Ajit hugged her tight and told her - " I m sorry, I will never let anything happen to you and OUR DAUGHTER ever."
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.
your appreciations and feedback means a lot.... do let me know if you like it and even if you don't :)
Friday, June 13, 2014
साँसे

तुम शायद मेरे लिए चलती साँसों के जैसे हो गए हो,
साथ रहते हो पर तुम्हारे साथ का एहसास नहीं होता,
जब तक थम जाने की नौबत न आये,
तब तक तुम्हारी ज़रुरत का आभास नहीं होता !
कभी बातें तो नहीं की साँसों से,
पर मेरे साथ वो भी, कभी धीमी होती, कभी चढ़ती जाती है,
पर पता भी नहीं चलता।
तुम वैसे ही रोते हो, हँसते हो साथ मेरे ,पर तुम्हारे हंसने-रोने का ख्याल नहीं आता !
बात ये नहीं की तुम्हारी ऐहमियत की समझ नहीं मुझे
पर साँसे जिस्म का हिस्सा ही तो है,
वैसे ही तुम्हारे खुद से अलग होने का एहसास नहीं होता।।
Tuesday, June 10, 2014
Friday, May 30, 2014
Wednesday, April 9, 2014
To vote or not to vote
'Vote for change', ' vote responsibly' , ' every vote counts' are some slogans which you are bombarded with recently. Everything is about elections, which is fine and that is how it should be. After all we are a democratic country. We should exercise our 'right to vote'.
Given all the hullabaloo that's happening and all the information overdose we get now a days ( manipulated and true) I the 'voter' feels like a superhero. (I supposedly have the power to change the country after all). Nevertheless a confused 'super hero'
So, here I am doing the best I can to make most of the power I will get on 17th April. Reading, listening discussing (read fighting) on social forums....again reading, listening and discussing (fighting even more vehemently) on social forums, but I am still confused !
The Big question I have in my mind right now is what am I voting for? A renaissance really! I know thats too much to ask for. On evaluating the options I have I am even more confused and scared. Scared, if we get into a deeper shit than what we are right now.
Here are the so called options we have
Congress:
Really!! ( lets not waste our time, we already wasted 10 years)
Really!! ( lets not waste our time, we already wasted 10 years)
BJP:
aka modi sarkar, so some major questions
- am I voting for narcissism or development, are we so desperate that we will choose someone supposedly responsible for a mass massacre. (I don't know if he was or not it is another story and every evidence out there against or in support of modi seems to be equally convincing)
- am I voting for the blood sucking corporates eventually.
- should I over look the development he has done in Gujarat and yes it just doesn't come from media it comes from people who live in Gujarat.
- even if for a second i keep all the negative things about modi aside, what about BJP as a whole? Who are the other people who will finally make a party, modi cant make a party on his own.
These are the same politicians, while the party changes traits of politicians do not.
AAP :
Yes he looks like an " aam aadmi" but is he really one?
Leave aside the perks he happily accepted when he claims to be an aam admi, thats not even a issue everybody wants some ROI out of their jobs. I do, so does kejriwal but there are bigger issues that bother me
Leave aside the perks he happily accepted when he claims to be an aam admi, thats not even a issue everybody wants some ROI out of their jobs. I do, so does kejriwal but there are bigger issues that bother me
Why is he only against BJP ( read modi) and speaks up against congress only when probed, is he a congress agent, a US agent or I don't know what as per the theories floating around.
Most importantly WHY did he quit????? Was his 49 days stunt all manipulated? WHY didn't he change one single thing in Delhi when he had the opportunity. I know change needs time would not have happened in 49 days. But why didn't he stay we all believed him and if he was really up to a change we would have been patient enough to see the change. But he simply quit, he didn't fight.
Did he quit because he was against the system? But shouldn't you be in the system to fight the system. Or did he simply get greedy. CM wasn't good enough?
Or is he misrepresented by media, is he falling prey to the political mafia, is he really up for change?
Ok even if he is, but is he competitive enough not in terms of scale, but in terms of his vision for the country. Right now all that comes out is a lovely rosy ideal and easy to say commitment. Corruption free country.. But how? What's the action plan? I don't need proofs but i need to hear a plan.
I would have appreciated if instead of whining about the existing system, he would have at least come with solutions.
Do we want a leader who cashes on the weakness of others, or someone who has a vision.
9 days to go and i am confused and scared, i feel like its an exam I am not prepared for. I understand the power of each vote and so I am scared. What if my vote contributes towards a wrong government? What if we land into the same situation. What if it gets worse?
I am a superhero with the power of vote, and it certainly counts so I will try and find out answers to all these questions to the best i can.
Or else it will be " none of the above" re-election is definitely better than suffering a bad government for next 5 years.
Whatever it might be I will vote and I will 'vote responsibly' and hope all the superheroes will.
Monday, March 24, 2014
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Caged
You are caged,
In the facade that you created
With those plastic smiles, the vanity bags
and the faces so diligently painted
In the frenzy to win the never ending rat races
The need to be validated, the need to be accepted
You smile when you want to laugh and you hide when you want to cry.
You talk things, things about politics, may be fashion or sports or whatever
But, never your heart, Never !
You wake up every morning to make a living but never to make a life.
You strive and strive harder by every passing day to create a life which is approved by them.
Yes Them, the neighbours, the aunts, the boss, the friend, that cousin...you don't know them.
You log in and logout just to be present,
and not to really "connect"
You marry, you bear kids, earn money and thats all you do,
You pray but you don't believe.
You point those fingers at the demons outside,but don't ever dare to look inside.
You put up a brave face, when you are actually scared.
You achieve glory at the pretense, of being radical.
No one cares how you look, talk,what you do, don't do.
In the facade that you created
With those plastic smiles, the vanity bags
and the faces so diligently painted
In the frenzy to win the never ending rat races
The need to be validated, the need to be accepted
You smile when you want to laugh and you hide when you want to cry.
You talk things, things about politics, may be fashion or sports or whatever
But, never your heart, Never !
You wake up every morning to make a living but never to make a life.
You strive and strive harder by every passing day to create a life which is approved by them.
Yes Them, the neighbours, the aunts, the boss, the friend, that cousin...you don't know them.
You log in and logout just to be present,
and not to really "connect"
You marry, you bear kids, earn money and thats all you do,
because they say that's all you are supposed to.
You pray but you don't believe.
You point those fingers at the demons outside,but don't ever dare to look inside.
You put up a brave face, when you are actually scared.
You achieve glory at the pretense, of being radical.
While you don't look beyond what has been shown,
you chicken out at the thought of doing beyond what has been done.
you chicken out at the thought of doing beyond what has been done.
What if I tell you, there is no one looking,
NO ONE !!
NO ONE !!
No one cares how you look, talk,what you do, don't do.
No one is looking, listening, judging
It doesn't matters really..
Will you still wear that plastic smile.
Carry on with relations u suffer, stick to that job you despise
Will you still hide when you want to cry.
Will you still put up that brave face when you are scared deep inside.
Will you restrain or jump and dance out of joy.
You know what? It doesn't matter really it doesn't.
You are just another minuscule particle
of this vast very very vast universe.
No one cares
And one day you will disappear
just like smoke as if you were never there.
So breathe, at least breathe
Fill up you lungs with life.
It's not time yet.
You can't be dead...
not now..
not now..
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Women's day - are we really ready for celebrations?
She doesn't pray anymore though she lives next to the "yellamma" temple. She lost her virginity when she was 13. She fell in love once but soon realised its too fancy an indulgence for her. She is the only "man" in the family of 5. But fears that she would no longer be there.....
She is suffering from HIV. She is a Devdasi - Prostitute of GOD!!!
Intimading and sacrilageous right??? But sadly its the truth that prevails at a much larger scale than we expect.
The devdasi culture is a perfect example of the disgusting hypocrisy that exists in our society. A society where we worship female deities in temples but are perfectly fine with commoditising women in every possible way - ads for men's deo, toothpaste, biscuits, cement, where women in skimpy clothes are extremely necessary (product is irrelevant as long a half naked women is there),we enjoy chikni chameli, and munni badnam with women dancing to detogatory lyrics. ( how does that matter that's our favourite party song)
Devdasi culture is another example of the levels to which a section of society can go down to in the name of religious rituals where parents turn pimps and hundreds of innocent girls are forced to become prostitutes in the name of GOD.
(To know more about devdasi culture click here)
On 8th march we will celebrate the "commercialisation of womenhood". We will go for our office sponsored lunches, like status updates on women's day share quotes on empowering women. Happily oblivious of the sect of women for whom being a women is a bane and not a boon, women who don't even get the fundamental right of being a human leave alone being a women.
But who cares? celebrating women's day is important in our lives with our metro sexual partners, stable careers, bank balances, supportive families, an equal status as our male counter parts and freedom of choice on allmost everything.
All of us have got our fair share of status and freedom in the society. We are already celebrating our womenhood every day we don't need a special day.
The day when each and every women gets the respect she deserves, when we the fortunate and empowered section of women step ahead and give our support to the less fortunate women and bring them to the same level. The day when a ritual like devdasis no more exists. That day we as a society deserve to celebrate women's day in its true sense.
Milaap is one such organisation which is helping these women. This women's day lets make our small contribution to help these women.
Saturday, March 1, 2014
Friends forever
They fell in love, got married
and lived happily ever after....
But not together
They were now best friends
The lost friend
Trying to search the benches of the classroom, the cards kept in that old envelope
the laughter hanging in memories, the secrets kept safely deep in my heart
Hoping to find you somewhere again some day....
my lost friend
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.
Every weekend, we give out creative writing topics for the bloggers who love to write.
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
Insanity!
she couldn't understand were they insane?
They threw stones at her, some were blabbering something incoherently, some one even tried to tear her already torn sari.
Has she come to an asylum accidentally !
And suddenly she felt the pain in her head, slowly the sounds were fading away.
the last thing she heard was
"she is mad, take her away"
They threw stones at her, some were blabbering something incoherently, some one even tried to tear her already torn sari.
Has she come to an asylum accidentally !
And suddenly she felt the pain in her head, slowly the sounds were fading away.
the last thing she heard was
"she is mad, take her away"
Thursday, September 26, 2013
कभी कभी यूँ ही मुड़कर उन खंडहरों में घूम आती हूँ,
ऐसा नही उसे फिरसे बसाने का अरमान है।
पर, उन टूटी फूटी दीवारों के बीच ज़िंदगी हँसती थी कभी,
वहाँ जहाँ मकड़ी के जाले हैं अब, सपने बस्ते थे कभी,
वो उजड़ा सा बगीचा रंगों से खेलता था कभी,
उन धूल से भरी तस्वीरों में मुस्कुराते लम्हे बस्ते थे कभी,
मैं तो वहाँ बस अपने ज़िंदा होने का एहसास करने चली जाती हूँ
उस बर्बाद खंडहर से इतनी मोहब्बत थी कभी ,
की अब उसकी बर्बादी पे रोना नही आता,
बस एक सकून है की वो अब भी खड़ा है वहीं
Monday, August 19, 2013
...and you are still there but..
At the stroke of midnight we met after what seemed like ages.
You caressed my cheeks Brushed away the stroke of hairs dancing on my face.
You wanted to look at my face without any distraction.
We laughed and talked for hours. You said I never looked as beautiful ever. You came near I could feel the warmth of your breath.
I closed my eyes.....
When I opened my eyes...you were still there sleeping besides me.
Not even acknowledging my existence.....
The night was cold. The warmth of your touch was not there.
And I realised...It was just a dream.
A drop of tear trickled down from the corner of my eyes.
You are still there....sleeping or are you awake???
A question I ask every night to myself...surprised at the audacity of my dreams, which still make way.
may be even you want to know...am I asleep or still awake. Do I still dream
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda
You caressed my cheeks Brushed away the stroke of hairs dancing on my face.
You wanted to look at my face without any distraction.
We laughed and talked for hours. You said I never looked as beautiful ever. You came near I could feel the warmth of your breath.
I closed my eyes.....
When I opened my eyes...you were still there sleeping besides me.
Not even acknowledging my existence.....
The night was cold. The warmth of your touch was not there.
And I realised...It was just a dream.
A drop of tear trickled down from the corner of my eyes.
You are still there....sleeping or are you awake???
A question I ask every night to myself...surprised at the audacity of my dreams, which still make way.
may be even you want to know...am I asleep or still awake. Do I still dream
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda
Monday, August 5, 2013
Those were the best days of my life
It Was the first day my tiny feet ventured to a new world outside
my eyes met yours, and you smiled.
we shared our dolls, ran in the parks and after rains enjoyed that wet mud..
But soon we were apart, and knew the time wont return
Your memories were the only reason I could smile..
I looked back and said - Ah those were the best days of my life.
I was lonely, and thought no one understands, and I met you.
You offered a cup of tea and we talked.
We shared those crazy dreams, whispered those secret thoughts.
Together we Laughed like insane
We cried for heart breaks and reasons simply lame.
And one day you left, you had bigger dreams to chase.
Time passed by but our crazy laughter still remains.
I pause and look back sometimes
and say ah..those were the best days of my life.
One day you came searching for me.
I was busy running behind the lifeless luxuries,
I thought I had no time to waste.
I couldn't see you the fog of ambitions Made my Vision dazed.
Today,the fog has cleared
And I find none near.
I pause, look back and wish time did not fly.
I often pass by those,moments and say.
Ah..those were the best days of my life
Sunday, July 28, 2013
‘Tring- Tring, the phone rang…!’
‘Tring- Tring, the phone rang…!’
She was scared to pick up the phone, 17 years ago on a day like this the phone rang to give her the news of captain ranjeet's death.
They had known each other since the first day of college, and fell in love almost instantaneously.
Adi, their son was 5 years old when the news came.
She didn't know what should she explain to adi.
But somehow adi understood, she cried the whole night holding him and he quietly hugged her.
At 21 adi Said - ma I want to join the army..she was shocked.
She fell silent for few mins, not knowing what to say.
Finally she uttered - ok beta, may lord Shiva always be by your side.
It has been over 15 days there has been no news from him. Last words she heard from him were - ma I miss the methi parathas, will come soon to savour them love you.
26th July 1982, was when Adi's dad died in a MIG plane crash, and today 26th July 1999, again the phone rang.
She picked up the phone with shivering hands and the voice on the other side Said - " ma we won, make methi parathas, will come home tommorow".
She was speechless yet again, tears of joy flowing through.
But suddenly, the tears of joy turned into tears of agony, knowing hundreds of mothers, haven't been,as lucky as her.
Silently she prayed for all the brave sons who sacrificed their lives in kargil.
She knew it won't be long enough when she will be dreading another phone call.
She wished that some day the phone rang and the voice on the other side Said -"the war is over , forever and ever"
Monday, July 22, 2013
...and I blushed..<3
It was raining that evening we met for the first time..
U looked into my eyes
and I blushed
you too were a little shy...
One day u gently took my hand, asked me to be forever yours..
And I blushed..
We knew our lives r taking another course
Standing near the pyre of fire we were taking vows..
And I blushed
I looked at u and I knew I couldn't have been loved any more
A part of you was breathing inside me, you kissed my forehead..
And I blushed. .
You had tears in your eyes,
you will always be by my side, that day u had said.
Years went by, ur hands were frail..
But u still held my hand tight
You hugged me and Said how beautiful I looked that night
I saw u smiling, but your smile was getting blurred
And I blushed
With my last breath, that moment for the last time..
U looked into my eyes
and I blushed
you too were a little shy...
One day u gently took my hand, asked me to be forever yours..
And I blushed..
We knew our lives r taking another course
Standing near the pyre of fire we were taking vows..
And I blushed
I looked at u and I knew I couldn't have been loved any more
A part of you was breathing inside me, you kissed my forehead..
And I blushed. .
You had tears in your eyes,
you will always be by my side, that day u had said.
Years went by, ur hands were frail..
But u still held my hand tight
You hugged me and Said how beautiful I looked that night
I saw u smiling, but your smile was getting blurred
And I blushed
With my last breath, that moment for the last time..
Sunday, May 12, 2013
दिल करता है फिरसे पापा की गुड़िया बन जाऊं,
थके हारे जब लौटे पापा, अपनी छोटी - छोटी हथेलियों से उनका माथा सहलाऊं।
कड़कती सर्दियों में पापा की शौल में लिपटे हुए,
उनकी गोद में ही सो जाऊं।
माँ जब डांटे किसी बात पर ,
तो पापा के पास अर्ज़ी ले जाऊं।
पापा के साथ नुक्कड़ की उस दूकान पे जाकर,
मनमानी कर खूब सारी चॉकलेट ले आऊं।
बहुत हुआ ये खेल बडों का,
दिल करता है बस अब पापा की गुड़िया बन, उस चौखट फिर लौट जाऊं।
बहुत हुआ ये खेल बडों का,
दिल करता है बस अब पापा की गुड़िया बन, उस चौखट फिर लौट जाऊं।
Saturday, May 11, 2013
बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी,
सड़क किनारे झगड़े थे जब हम,तर बतर पानी में भीगते हुए
कभी रूठते , कभी मनाते ,सरसराती ठण्ड से कांपते हुए।
बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी ,
जब एक छोटी सी छतरी लेके मैंने तुमको घर तक छोड़ा था ,
वो अदना सी छतरी बारिश के तेज़ झोंके रोक सके इतनी कहाँ औकात थी उसकी,
वो तो तुम्हारे साथ चंद लम्हे चुराने का एक बहाना था।
बारिश वाली एक वो शाम थी,
जब तुम मिलने नहीं आये थे,
खिड़की के किनारे बारिश की बूंदों से खेलते हुए ,
न जाने कितने घंटो हमने फ़ोन पर, बातें करते हुए बिताए थे।
बारिश वाली एक शाम आज भी है पर ,
अब हम झगड़ते नहीं है,
अदना सी वो छतरी आज भी है कहीं, पर अब हम साथ चलते नहीं है।
अब हम साथ में बारिश को साथ में बैठकर तकते ज़रूर है,
पर करने को बातें नहीं है।
बारिश वाली वो शाम तो आज भी आई है,
पर बूंदों में अब वो बात नहीं है।
हर वक़्त लगता है की कुछ कीमती सा खो गया गया है ,
ढूँढने निकलती हूँ जब , तो क्या खोया मैंने समझ नहीं आता है
लगता है जैसे वो किताब जो पढ़नी शुरू की थी मैंने , वो अब भी अधूरी है ,
पर पन्ने छानती हूँ जब तो वो खोया हुआ जुमला कहीं मिल नहीं पता है
लगता है जैसे अरसों हुए घर लौटे ,
घर की तरफ निकलती हूँ जब तो लौट जाने का रास्ता नज़र नहीं आता है
कभी हँसते - हँसते एक आंसू पलकों पर उतर आता है,
फिरसे मुस्कुराने की कोशिश करती हूँ जब , तो वो हँसता सा लम्हा याद नहीं आता है।
कभी हँसते - हँसते एक आंसू पलकों पर उतर आता है,
फिरसे मुस्कुराने की कोशिश करती हूँ जब , तो वो हँसता सा लम्हा याद नहीं आता है।
Friday, March 22, 2013
इंसानों की इस बस्ती में, इंसानों ने ही मोल ना पाया,
पत्थरों को भगवान बनाकर, चार दीवारों में छुपाया,
भूल गए हम, खुले आसमानों में उड़ने वाले उस पंछी को भी ईश्वर ने ही बनाया।
फल, फूल, दूध, दही का चढ़ावा उस पत्थर को चढ़ाया,
इंसानों की भूख को भूल गए हम, जिसको उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।
इन पत्थरों के नाम पर हर दिन का एक रंग बनाया ,
भूल गए हम इस संसार के हर एक रंग को उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।
पत्थरों से बनी उस देवी को, कपड़ो, गहनों से सजाया,
भूल गए करना उस औरत का सम्मान जिसको उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।
पत्थरों का धर्म बनाकर, उस एक दूजे का खून बहाया ,
भूल गए हम हर इंसान को एक सा, उसी इश्वर ने बनाया।
इंसानों की इस बस्ती में इंसानों ने ही मोल न पाया,
पत्थरों की पूजा करते करते, ईश्वर के बनाये उस इंसान ने,
अपने अन्दर के इंसान को ही गंवाया।
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश........
कहीं दिल के कोने में दबी।
झांकती हुई एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ......
आसमानों में उड़ने की नहीं,
पर अपनी सी लगे जो,
उस एक टुकड़े ज़मीन को पाने की।
एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ......
सूरज के उजाले को छोड़कर ,
एक अपना सिर्फ अपना खामोश अँधेरा सा कोना ढूँढने की।
एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं .....
अपने आस पास की मुस्कुराहटों से दूर जाकर
एक छोटी सी मुस्कराहट अपने अन्दर ढूँढने की।
एक छुपी सी ख्वाहिश है कहीं ....
दूसरों की आशाओं को भूलकर
थोड़ी देर के लिए ही सही,पर खुदगर्ज़ हो जाने की।
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